FAQs: Resigning & Removing Name from LDS Church Records

Concise Version

If you don't want the FAQs or explanation, jump straight to the concise steps description.  Otherwise, read on.

Removing Name from Church Records

During our last interview with our bishop, he said an interesting quote I think he immediately wanted to take back: "You do realize that we'll follow you forever."  He clearly thought what he was saying was a loving statement but when he heard himself, he realized how scary that sounds. He faltered and looked at my wife and followed it with "...if that will be ok with you?" Her answer was "That won't be a problem."  Ah pure woman genius.

Why Resign?

As stated, once a member always a member, until you resign/remove your name from the church records through the official process. 

What does that mean?  It means that you are on the EQ lists of people to visit each month, you will be talked about in PEC and ward council meetings, the primary and youth programs will be thinking of ways to bring one of your children back to church... yes all of that is true. 

Am I being alarmist?  Of course not, I did those very activities under multiple bishoprics in several wards.  I created monthly printouts of all the names in the ward, I looked at their attendance records, I saw their temple recomment status, I working with the YM/YW leaders to discuss how to involve the children and hopefully pull their parents into activity and the priesthood quorums were given a report of exactly how long it has been since each and every family was visited.

To the chagrin of several of us in the Ward Council, there was also plenty of talk, gossip, whatever. 

Also, please note that if you do not resign and church leaders see you doing anything untoward regarding church rules or saying anything about church history that isn't "faith promoting" they can always take disciplinary measures, with or without your presence. This is not just speculation, I already know several people personally and many, many more online where posting something to Facebook, talking to church friends about the facts of history, etc. has resulted in a invitation to a disciplinary council (also called a "court of love").

I think I already resigned...?

Do NOT trust that any ecclesiastical leader (bishop, elders' quorum president or even the stake president) has "removed" you no matter what they say.  They have not.  Even if home teachers don't know for months, years, I can promise you that unless you sent the letter to Salt Lake (see the instructions below) then your name is almost certainly still on church records.

Why not Resign?

You may have family that you wish to stay for. You may want to still stay in fellowship in some manner or another or perhaps you like monthly visits from church members.  Generally if these things apply to you, you are likely more a NOM (New Order Mormon, see the dictionary of terms) and would like to stay in.

For the rest of us, there just isn't any good reason to hang on to the church and the doubts, judgement and constant reminders that LDS think you are wicked, apostate or fallen.

Will the church honor my resignation?

They absolutely must by law.  There was a landmark case years ago in which a church member tried to resign, the church refused/deferred/delayed but months later that same church excommunicated the member. This person sued, and won, the case.  Since then, all churches have created a manner in which they can remove themselves from the church.  They often do not publicize the steps of course, thus the confusion for general membership on what the real process is. 

Do I need to have a meeting with the bishop or stake president?

No!  You do not.  

No matter what the bishop says.  In fact, the instruction giving from the Stake Presidency on this topic to bishoprics was (intentionally?) vague on this topic so I doubt your bishop even knows the facts.

Do I need to send a letter to the bishop or stake president?

That is one way to have your name removed because they are required to comply by law.  The one issue with that is they will, of course, try to contact you to dissuade you and, I'm speaking from experience here, they will sometimes lose the copy.

I've even had the letter scrutinized in a bishopric before where they said they weren't sure the signature was in place, or some other technicality.

Now I'm making it sound malicious, I can promise you that everyone involved thinks they are doing this with the greatest love and charity.  There is no conspiracy to keep membership numers strong (not at the ward levels anyway).  But this is because they are still entirely convinced the church is truth and they sincerely believe that you are about to condemn yourself to hell. Some even believe this is the unpardonable sin.  It's crazy, but they believe it.

Why does the bishop/stake president/eq president/hp group leader tell me that I need to take these steps, write letters, meet with people and/or call them on the phone?

They are instructed to do that and none of them are given a complete answer on this topic.  Instructions frequently change.

Can I resign via email?

Yes.

Can I resign without talking to anyone?

Yes.

Can I resign directly to Salt Lake?

Yes.

What do I do if I'm in another country?

Use email and/or send a letter to Salt Lake just like below.  Sadly, the delays will be greater.

Do I need to know my membership record numbers?

No though it could help. I've heard from many others that they did not and their names were removed successfully.  The times when it becomes difficult is when your name and address you provide does not match 100% with the current church records.  Maybe you've been inactive for years and moved a few times?  If your name could have a duplicate and your address doesn't match, they may not remove you.

STEP 1: Ok, so what do I do? 

First, collect a couple details:

1. Your full name(s) as they appear on church records.
2. Birthdates
3. Current address (hopefully this matches the church records)
4. Baptism dates (if you have them, though I've seen success without this)
5. Membership record numbers (if you have them, though I've seen success without this)

Second write a letter.  Use this one below if you want (it's the one that we used). Change it if you wish. But do not equivocate in the language.  State that from this moment forward you are not a member of the church, you understand what that means and that you don't expect to meet with any leadership or other church members about the decision and that you want your records removed.

Third email the letter to the church records department.

msr-confrec@ldschurch.org

Also, I cc'ed this email

dodgegw@ldschurch.org

In the past these emails were sent to a specific email address (the person formerly in charge of resignation letters) which is the second email above.

If you mail supports "receipt notifications" use them.  This means that when a person opens an email, you will get notification that it has been opened.  Microsoft Outlook supports this features.  Gmail supports this only if you have a Gov, Education or Business (paid) account with Google.  Regular gmail and Google Apps for Domains mail accounts don't.

Here is our letter (which we modified from ones we've seen online that other people used):

Member Records Division, LDS Church
50 E North Temple Rm 1372
SLC UT 84150-5310 

This letter is our formal resignation from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and it is effective immediately. We hereby withdraw our consent to being treated as members and we withdraw our consent to being subject to church rules, policies, beliefs and "discipline". As we are no longer members, we want our names permanently and completely removed from the membership rolls of the church. We wish to remove our names as well as the names of our children.

We have given this matter considerable thought. We understand what you consider the "seriousness" and the "consequences" of our actions. We are aware that the church handbook says that our resignation "cancels the effects of baptism and confirmation, withdraws the priesthood held by a male member and revokes temple blessings" We also understand that we will be "readmitted to the church by baptism only after a thorough interview". 

Our resignation should be processed immediately, without any "waiting periods". We are not going to be dissuaded and we are not going to change our minds. 

We expect this matter to be handled promptly, with respect and with full confidentiality. 

After today, the only contact we want from the church is a single letter of confirmation to let us know that we are no longer listed as a members of the church. Our address is [Our Address] (in the [Our Ward] in the [Our Stake]).


Sincerely, 

My Name

Record #: 

Birthday: 

Baptism: 

My SO

Record #: 

Birthday: 

Baptism: 

Child #1

Record #: (I didn't have this for one of the kids)

Birthday: 

Baptism: 

Address:

[our address]

What do I do if I don't have all that information?

From the experiences of others out there, membership numbers haven't always been required.  Also, I'm not sure on baptism dates.  What is critical though is that there can be no equivocation on who you are so addresses and other details to confirm you are who you say is important.

I got a letter and it doesn't say I've been removed?

Note that in the letter you said you resign effective immediately. Period. You are out of the church and they have no legal rights to contact you as a member.  Still, you'll find that it isn't yet over.

They will send you a final warning response.  We got ours the very same week we sent our resignation email.  In fact, only two days later.

I later found out that a whole group of us got the same letter (different bishop mentioned in the letter) on the same day.

What I don't know is whether or not this was great timing (a monthly thing?) or whether they prepare these weekly.

STEP 2: What will happen next? 

First, you will get a pamphlet in the mail and a letter.  The pamphlet tells you what a serious thing you are doing and to change your mind.  

It also says that you have NOT been removed and that they are sending this to local authorities.  Apparently you get this no matter what you put in the letter.

At this point you have three options:

A) You can wait until your bishop contacts you. This may happen quickly or they may sit on it for months and months (or never act on it). You should gauge the relationship you have with your local ward/bishop on this.

B) You can email or call the bishop and tell him to please process it, you don't have anything else to discuss, you are within your rights and they can't hold you hostage (without legal repercussions if you wish to add that into it).

C) You can skip the bishop/stake pres altogether by making the Step 2 letter.  This involves you taking a picture/copy of your letter from them and reminding them that they are on rocky legal grounds.  Example and instructions are here:
http://www.mormonresignation.com/resign_letterreturned.html

When will it actually be over?

You will then get a confirmation letter in the mail (about 1 or 2 months later) with actual confirmation it is done.  Possibly another pamphlet and a statement they are sorry that you were offended (perpetuating the same old myth that members have that the reason most leave is because they were offended, it can't possibly be because the church just isn't true).  Also an invitation that you can still come back.

The Stake President and local leaders will get notification on official church stationery. The MLS (the church's software) will automatically remove you.  

They will have a prayer circle for you (I'm kidding, not really).